villagelogs | 021 » WHAT GOES AROUND GHOST AROUND

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021 » WHAT GOES AROUND GHOST AROUND

characters: Elena Gilbert and funeral goers—Elijah Mikaelson, Dean Winchester and Helen Magnus.
location: The makeshift cemetery, south Mathias.
date/time: Late evening, say 6pm.
content: Overwhelmed with guilt, Elena holds a little ceremony for the spectre that she witnessed being murdered. In reality, she's holding it for herself.
warnings: Mentions of death, grief, murder.

The makeshift cemetery could use another marker.

Wrapped up in a long, thick winter coat with a patterned scarf wrapped around her neck, Elena isn't quite sure of what to make of the little gathering that's appeared for the spectre. Perhaps they think she's a little lost (they're not wrong) or perhaps they think that she's saying goodbye to someone she knows (she is). Whatever their reasons, it doesn't matter in the end. The one lesson she's learned over the last few years is that strangers or acquaintances tend to pull through for her when she least expects it.

She ensures not to kick the lantern that flickers by her side as she kneels on the snow. It soaks through her jeans and sticks to the denim, but she hardly shivers. It's with an old and worn sneaker (she couldn't find a hammer) that she hammers in the uneven, splintering plank of wood into the earth and snow. She does her best with her human strength, but it's a little on the wonky side.

There's no name on the makeshift marker. Elena had known what name she wanted to put on there, but she uses the excuse of Elijah's presence to forgo using the pen in her pocket.

Letting out an exhale, she looks at the marker. "This is for whoever you've lost that you didn't get to say goodbye to." Plucking the thick pen from her pocket, she still doesn't look up. "You can write that person's name on the wood if you want."

Elena will be when everyone's gone. She'll write two names on the wooden panel.

Jenna Sommers.
Spectre.

[ ooc: Anyone is welcome to have seen Elena determinedly gather things from the general store and abandoned houses and followed her to the cemetery. Action spam/prose welcome.

The above write-up is my top level so I'll assume anyone who tags in wants to interact with Elena. (Please note she has a Madness that means she has a fear of being buried alive or of cemeteries, ha.) That said, please feel free to top level as I imagine some of you may want to interact with one another! (Just imagine everyone coupling off to talk quietly since one big long thread with multiple people is bound to be, in the words of Beyonce, a disas-tuh.)

Any qs, you can reach me here. ]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ elena lingers longer than she should. a growing panic begins to bubble in her chest, and as she remains on her snow-soaked knees, she feels like she's trying to swim to the surface of a very deep, forboding pond. the sensation begins to climb up her spine the longer she stops thinking.

inhaling deeply, elena holds it and gets rid of it with the fierce grip of her pen. what happens next is quick: she raises it above her head and pelts it into the snow nearby.

it's a petulant display, and one she begins to feel horrified by, but the snow and the chill chips away at her walls of trying to appear in control and perfect around elijah. truthfully, she's been masking herself to hide away from her own shadow.

when she exhales, she's panting like she's run a marathon. hands on her knees, she curls her fingers into her jeans. her anger feels so palpable and hot that she considers taking off her thick coat. ]

I'll go get it.

No.

( to say he's concerned is an understatement. he knows that elena gilbert has been through an immense amount of change in a short amount of time so displays like this shouldn't surprise him.

but he's also seen elena demonstrate enormous amounts of control when faced with adversity so this display isn't all together normal. he waves her off, letting her have a moment to herself while he retrieves what she's thrown.

he sighs, dusting the snow off of it before he comes back to elena, taking several deep, deep breaths to keep his own control under lock and key. )

Your ceremony was nice.

( he wants to ask her about what's just happened but he holds off for now. )

Thank you.

[ for both things—fetching the pen she'd thrown and for his compliment. it hardly feels enough. jenna deserves a tombstone and a proper burial, and she deserves to have on her tombstone an indication that she had been old and grey and had died naturally. tears prick her eyes but heed her wish not to fall.

she doesn't know why the idea of a cemetery fills her with a soft trepidation over her comfort. being amongst the dead had given her a strange source of feeling stable and centred, and now…

ignoring it. that's what she does best.

she frowns as she peers up at him. ] What's wrong?

Nothing.

( that's his answer today and everyday. nothing is wrong with him that he can't deal with and he has to in order to make sure that he stays focused on what they need to do to adapt to this place and to survive. )

I suppose I'm still getting used to this place, still. But, I'm all right, Elena. Nothing for you to worry about.

( he even smiles slightly. )

How are you feeling now? After doing this for the spectre.

[ regarding him with a slightly disbelieving look, elena lets it go for the moment. elijah is still an unknown entity to her. she doesn't know how far she can push him and she doesn't know if he's someone who likes to talk or prefers to sit in the dark and brood instead. as far as she can tell, he has no itch to pour himself onto a page.

inhaling deeply through her nose, her exhale sees her shoulders slump and her face fall. every bit of strength she had been using to keep herself straight and tall and afloat crumbles now that it's just the two of them. ]

I feel tired. [ really tired. almost two years' worth of tired.

she brushes her hair behind her ear, some of the strands missing the loop. keeping her gaze ducked, she sees her vision blur before she blinks to try and pull it back. looking at jenna's name, she shakes her head. ] And I'm not fine. I'm tired of saying I'm fine.

( elijah just watches her for a few moments before he nods, understanding. he wouldn't say he's tired but he would absolutely say he's not fine. that's not something he can or will tell her, not with what she's dealing with now.

sighing, elijah steps closer and rests a gentle hand on her shoulder. he hopes she doesn't back away because he only means to try and comfort. )

Come on, let's go back to the room. You need to sit down and I'll find something for you to eat. You can allow yourself the rest of this day to relax.

[ maybe if she does that, she can feel spirited and strong and all those things that make her feel normal again. since being here, she feels like she's been teetering on almost tipping over, and she supposes she has now. it's embarrassing to do so in front of elijah, but it beats doing so in front of so many other people.

his hand is warm and solid on her shoulder, and she can't help but inhale to exhale, feeling his hand move with her breath. ]

That's probably a good idea. [ she peers up at him with a small, slightly worn smile. ] You're a good ideas kind of person. Did anyone ever tell you that?

[ she's slow to pull herself up to her feet. ]

Not as of late, no. Maybe not in the last few centuries.

( he keeps his hand on her shoulder and starts to lead her back to their room. he's glad that she's not arguing and that she's allowing him this little bit of comfort. )

Are you feeling any better now that you've done that? I know you're not fine but are you feeling any better?

( has giving the spectre peace helped at all? )

I don't know.

[ she doesn't let herself think of her answer. does she feel better? yes. does she feel lighter? no. jenna is dead. she wears death like a thick, heavy cowl that's too big for her.

she lets him guide her; there's no other reason for her not to let him. she trusts him implicitly, something that knows damon would think her stupid for. ]

I guess it feels good to acknowledge that Jenna's… [ she inhales and then lets it out, feeling her shoulders sag. tears prick her eyes, but all she does is shake her head. ] Jenna is dead. And I hate your brother for it.

It might surprise you, Elena, but you're not the only one who hates my brother.

( it's the lightest of jokes before he shakes and then bows his head. he makes no excuses for his brother. niklaus has made many mistakes in his life and though he will rationalize them, elijah knows that sometimes his brother is just a bastard. )

For what it's worth, Elena, and I don't know if it's worth anything at all, I am sorry about your aunt. I'm making no excuses for it, I'm just sorry.

[ if she ignores the tears, then she can pretend they're not there and she's not crying. but the cold makes her face feel sharp and it's impossible for her to ignore the fact that she is. she lifts her hands up to rub her hands hard against her cheeks and ensures not to look at him. she hadn't wanted to think of jenna, but the spectre being brutalised in front of her felt like history repeating itself too soon. ]

I'm not going to be able to bury her, so… [ she clears her throat and looks out at the snow as if it's able to steady her. ] She didn't deserve to die. Not in the way that she did.

[ elena feels it was undignified. ]

She didn't.

( elijah bows his head, unsure of what to say. he can't make this better and he can't absolve his brother of his sins. what happened to elena's aunt was a tragedy that could have been prevented.

but, what's done is done. he sighs. )

But, you can remember her and I hope you continue to do that, Elena. I hope you never forget her.

I don't want to forget her.

[ if she forgets her, it means jenna died in vain. it means her parents died in vain. she refuses to forget them even when it feels like it'd be a lot easier to simply turn off her memory and her emotions attached to it.

but she has to live with it. every choice she makes, every choice made around her, she has to live with it. isn't that what being human is all about? ]

Do you think we could go back to the Boarding House? I'm starting to feel... [ she presses her lips together and shakes her head, arms wrapping around her chest. ] I just don't want to be out here anymore. Is that okay?

That's all right. Of course it's all right.

( elijah reaches out and curls a hand around her bicep, giving her a little tug to get her feet moving. once she starts walking, he let's go but he fall into easy step beside her, not speaking. )

Maybe you should lie down once we're back. You could probably use the rest.

( between the phsyical turmoil of arriving here and all the emotional upheaval, she has to be tired. )

[ walking makes her feel a little better. she has an objective, and that's to get back to the boarding house. sometimes, having those little goals helped her in the aftermath of losing her parents.

she wishes that he'd wrap his arm around her, but that's a wish that truly belongs to stefan. she wishes he was here. his smile and broody frown always made her feel sturdy when she felt adrift.

but stefan isn't here, so elena knows she has to keep herself afloat.

she tugs in a rough breath. ] I'll sit down. [ and she'll no doubt fall asleep, but the upward tilt of her chin wants to defy the fact she's human and tired and been thrown through the wringer several times over. ]

There's some things I need to talk to you about and I can't do that if I rest like you want me to.

Very well.

( he's silent for a few moments, walking by her side and helping her traverse the snow and the unfamiliar landscape. )

You know, when people say that, it's usually a harbinger of something bad.

( but that was his luck, wasn't it? )

Or it could be a harbinger of something good.

[ she's never one to pass up an opportunity to look at the bright side. there was always one, even during a highly emotional and negative feeling moment.

she glances at him and then turns her gaze away, sighing softly. ]

Or at least eye-opening. [ she lets out a heavier breath and clears her throat, imagining that elijah isn't one to skirt around the details. ] I was talking to Dean and he very heavily implied that you were too intense with him.

I'm too intense for everyone, Elena. I did nothing more than speak with him.

( elijah doesn't even know how he'd be too intense for anyone but he barely stops himself from rolling his eyes. he could have been much, much more intense and here was dean, complaining to elena. )

How cute that he thought to talk to you about it instead of myself. Are you going to lecture me?

I don't have it in me to lecture you even if I wanted to.

[ and she doesn't particularly feel like it. in all honesty, elena is very tired of being put in the middle by two men. she's not a tennis ball to knock back and forth in a court. she's not a pawn to be used to pit against one another. grown men can work their own shit out without a teenage girl who's dead tired getting in the middle of it. ]

He felt like you implied something… indecent was happening between the two of us. I don't know what you said, but I'm assuming you were trying to look out for me. [ she gives him a kind, tired smile. ] I can look out for myself.

What?

( elijah stops walking at that, looking at elena like she's sprouted two heads. he thinks back on the conversation between he and dean and scoffs, shaking his head. )

I don't know what he got out of the conversation but I didn't imply anything like that. You're a teenager and I am not. I want to help you, that's it.

( he feels annoyance creep up that someone would think he would try that. that was more something his brother kol would do. )

If anything, I applied he was an indiot.

[ she can't help but shake her head in amusement. he reminds her a little of stefan.

she hadn't expected he would stop walking. she's a couple of steps ahead of him before she turns and takes one to shorten the distance between them. selfishly, she doesn't want to be standing alone right now. ]

Apparently, he's suspicious of you—or everyone, I don't really know. But he knows a lot about the supernatural. I feel like you're on his radar, and you would know better than me how paranoid hunters or Council members or whatever can be when they think they've got someone all worked out.

[ like dogs with a bone. the conversation had made elena uncomfortable. the last thing she wants is vampire trouble in this town. elijah's a good person, someone who's helped her when he never owed her a thing. she feels like she should be helping him.

and she's trying to. ]

Of course.

( it's something to be cautious about. elijah isn't ashamed of what he is but he's been keeping a low profile for the moment while he gauges these people and how they might be able to handle what he is. elena knows and that's enough for now.

he sighs, giving his head a shake. he admits that he'd been a little over the top with dean but he hadn't been able to help himself. )

He's welcome to be suspicious of me if that's what makes him happy. He's far from the first and he won't be the last. And here I thought I hadn't made a good impression.

I know you're a billion years old and you can take care of yourself, but...

[ they're in a strange town that not even elijah, the billion-year-old vampire, can figure out. elena thinks she has a right to be suspicious of this place and the way some people may use it to hurt others. her conversation with dean had felt a little like dealing with a young caroline—for all the talk of braiding hair, elena doubts the hair that he wants to braid is hers and being shoved into the middle of a testosterone-filled squabble is the last thing on her to-do list.

her experience with people taking an avid liking to the person she seems closest to is limited in comparison to elijah's. still doesn't mean she's not worried. elena gilbert is tired of the people she cares for—no matter the degree—being taken from her.

maybe she should continue walking, but she stands before him and speaks quietly. ] I haven't told anyone you're, you know. Just in case you were worried.

I wasn't worried but I also...trust that you wouldn't do that. I know we don't know each other well, Elena, but I know you wouldn't tell anyone anything without my consent.

( despite all that elena's experienced and dealt with, elijah thinks she still retains the things that make her a good, caring, compassionate person.

he sighs and shakes his head. )

I'm sure it's going to be something that comes out sooner or later but I appreciate your discretion. I trust you.

Edited 2021-01-05 21:42 (UTC)

It shouldn't have to. If it's something you want to keep private, it should be kept private. It doesn't matter that this is a small town.

[ but elena knows better than anyone that there are some people who simply can't keep their noses out of things that aren't their own business. as much as she likes mrs lockwood, she had always had her fingers where they didn't belong. it always caused unnecessary stress for elena, especially after the pocket watch debacle. ]

Being a vampire is hardly the most riveting thing or scary thing about this town.

[ hello, how did they even get here? ]

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