"I'm not," he promised again, one hand sliding over Malcolm's splayed hand to tuck their fingers around one another. "You're the only reason why I'm not. You're the only reason I'm still here. But I know I can't do it all on my own. If I were better, if you were.. If this place was normal maybe but. It's not. And part of me feels like shit for not bein' able to handle it all."