"I gotta ask," Eliot grumbles, his eyes still wide with worry.

And then--and then he asks that question and Eliot's defenses crumble completely. And so does his face.

Suddenly it's vulnerable, as if all of his many jumbled emotions are right there on display. It's not fair, it's not fair he has to do this but he deserves this. He deserved it the moment he put Hardison in danger that day.

"I..."

He's so unprepared, his mind jumbled with the horror of it all, with the regret, the sadness--

--he finally collects himself, somewhat, and looks away. He can't quite meet his eyes.

"...it didn't matter if I told you or not."

There's a pained pause.

"What mattered is that you got out and the mission was completed."

Nothing he could do or say, no apology he could make, would ever make up for what he did.