we all have to go sometime(death and awakening narration)
There were jokes shared over coffee, three housemates hanging out and having something that almost felt like a good time, a brief respite from the general weirdness that plagues Mathias. A normal evening that had gone awry in ways that even Negan's never seen before in his goddamn life. He should have known. Every instinct had been telling him to go back in, hide. Something was coming. Why the fuck hadn't he listened to his gut? Just because you got backup doesn't always mean jack shit.
Everything that comes after happens in a whirlwind and the weight of terrible mistakes made by tempting fate.
Because he always thinks he'll come out on top, doesn't he? Fucking moron.
Something was on the prowl and they were on the menu.
There wasn't any way to get back inside when they tried.
Raylan had yelled to run and they all did, he thinks. But like the headless chickens that they were, they'd scattered wrong, hadn't stuck together. He broke his own damn rule with that one, his bad. Run, hide, survive. Those instincts kept him alive for how fucking long? How long had it kept others alive? But they failed him tonight.
"C'mon," he'd urged Neal, pulse pounding in his ears, hairs on his neck standing up as he wonders where they're even fucking going. They need some place to hide, lay low for a while, and he's about to tell Neal as much when he realizes the goddamned idiot just stopped moving.
"You motherfucking dumbass, you get your fucking ass--" It's too late though. It's too late. It's all too fucking late and Negan thinks for a moment he's losing his goddamn mind as Neal is lost in a hell of a gory fucking display. He can't save him. For a moment, Negan can't do anything. They say your life flashes before your eyes before you die, don't they?
His must be just the bad reels, or maybe it's all bad reels that he's actually got. His mom getting her goddamn face mangled because he couldn't say no to bringing home strays, and all the sneaking around on Lucille, making a fucking murder bat in her honor like that wouldn't twist her stomach. The heads he's bashed in and faces he's burnt with hot irons in the name of punishment and keeping people in line, alive. He can dress it up as nice and pretty as he fucking wants, but for a moment, Negan feels his insides twist up painfully with the weight of all the shit he's done in his life.
The regret because that's not who he ever wanted to be and now he's not sure he'll get a chance to change it even if he wanted.
He's a coward in the end. He can't face what's coming for him with any sort of dignity. He turns on his toe and tries to run away, cursing as a lingering image of a head caved in lingers in his head, along with the mangled words of a dying man making promises to his fucking pregnant wife even with Negan's taunts in the background.
I just popped your skull so hard, your eyeball popped out... and that shit is gross.
He doesn't realize the scream and pained cry that rings in his ears is actually his at first. He's still trying to process the pain that rips and shoots through him, the sickening knowledge that this is actually it. This is the end of the fucking line for him and no amount of bravado will save him from getting fucking torn up and mangled, just like it never saved anybody he's ever killed in his goddamn life.
Part of him is just aware enough to feel guilty that Neal died for nothing on top of it all if Raylan didn't make it somewhere safe. Hell, he should never have died for Negan in the first place, that's already sort of a fucking failure.
When everything goes blissfully black finally, Negan found himself hoping that would be it. He's so fucking tired.
But no, instead he wakes in a panic under an unfamiliar night sky with everything bathed in red. Looking around him, there's blood. His blood? It should be his blood, but he's pretty sure he's goddamn fine fine. Nothing hurts at least. It takes him longer than he cares to admit to find the will to climb to his feet and check properly though.
Part of him wants to stay there and freeze.
The bigger part of him can never do that, no matter how much he wants to stop.
"Goddammit, is this what Hell looks like?" Going pretty hardcore on the spooky vibe, if he does say so himself.
Somewhere in the distance, he hears a familiar voice yelling his name. Raylan--
Fuck, Neal. And how many others were caught in this shit?
That's enough to get him moving again at least.
man about town (OTA)
Well, Negan still isn't sure this shit isn't Hell or some freaky death induced hallucination while his corpse finishes pissing and shitting itself in its death throes. Either way, he can't say he doesn't deserve any of this, if this is some sort of eternal damnation situation. Maybe that's what all of Mathias is. A punishment of some kind for assholes. It doesn't track entirely when he's met plenty of seemingly decent people, but it's a working theory.
After breaking off from Neal and Raylan when he finds them, Negan heads out to search through some shit. 1306, but there's no sign of his other housemates or anything especially useful right in this moment. That's... good? Hopefully anyway. He's taking advantage of the new found clarity in this shitehole and searching whatever he can while he can.
He's also going to keep an eye out for any familiar faces he can. This is all fucked as all goddamn hell, but they're still in this together. They all split up too far without giving a shit about each other, they're just gonna die... again? Whatever.
it's hot in the city tonight (OTA)
Sure, why not a fire storm on top of everything else? Nothing else makes sense, so this might as well goddamn happen to all of them. Negan is near all the action when it starts, the fire almost an entity in its own right. He watches in amazement as it jumps from building to building, leaving some behind unscathed for reasons he can't even fathom or comprehend. It isn't until he realizes it seems like it's coming for people too that he snaps into action.
He can be less of a shit person and try to save someone else, get them out of the way.
Or maybe he'll fail at even that and get swallowed up by flames before he can even so much as utter "Hey, you! Get the fuck out of the way!"
Negan | The Walking Dead
There were jokes shared over coffee, three housemates hanging out and having something that almost felt like a good time, a brief respite from the general weirdness that plagues Mathias. A normal evening that had gone awry in ways that even Negan's never seen before in his goddamn life. He should have known. Every instinct had been telling him to go back in, hide. Something was coming. Why the fuck hadn't he listened to his gut? Just because you got backup doesn't always mean jack shit.
Everything that comes after happens in a whirlwind and the weight of terrible mistakes made by tempting fate.
Because he always thinks he'll come out on top, doesn't he? Fucking moron.
Something was on the prowl and they were on the menu.
There wasn't any way to get back inside when they tried.
Raylan had yelled to run and they all did, he thinks. But like the headless chickens that they were, they'd scattered wrong, hadn't stuck together. He broke his own damn rule with that one, his bad. Run, hide, survive. Those instincts kept him alive for how fucking long? How long had it kept others alive? But they failed him tonight.
"C'mon," he'd urged Neal, pulse pounding in his ears, hairs on his neck standing up as he wonders where they're even fucking going. They need some place to hide, lay low for a while, and he's about to tell Neal as much when he realizes the goddamned idiot just stopped moving.
"You motherfucking dumbass, you get your fucking ass--" It's too late though. It's too late. It's all too fucking late and Negan thinks for a moment he's losing his goddamn mind as Neal is lost in a hell of a gory fucking display. He can't save him. For a moment, Negan can't do anything. They say your life flashes before your eyes before you die, don't they?
His must be just the bad reels, or maybe it's all bad reels that he's actually got. His mom getting her goddamn face mangled because he couldn't say no to bringing home strays, and all the sneaking around on Lucille, making a fucking murder bat in her honor like that wouldn't twist her stomach. The heads he's bashed in and faces he's burnt with hot irons in the name of punishment and keeping people in line, alive. He can dress it up as nice and pretty as he fucking wants, but for a moment, Negan feels his insides twist up painfully with the weight of all the shit he's done in his life.
The regret because that's not who he ever wanted to be and now he's not sure he'll get a chance to change it even if he wanted.
He's a coward in the end. He can't face what's coming for him with any sort of dignity. He turns on his toe and tries to run away, cursing as a lingering image of a head caved in lingers in his head, along with the mangled words of a dying man making promises to his fucking pregnant wife even with Negan's taunts in the background.
I just popped your skull so hard, your eyeball popped out... and that shit is gross.
He doesn't realize the scream and pained cry that rings in his ears is actually his at first. He's still trying to process the pain that rips and shoots through him, the sickening knowledge that this is actually it. This is the end of the fucking line for him and no amount of bravado will save him from getting fucking torn up and mangled, just like it never saved anybody he's ever killed in his goddamn life.
Part of him is just aware enough to feel guilty that Neal died for nothing on top of it all if Raylan didn't make it somewhere safe. Hell, he should never have died for Negan in the first place, that's already sort of a fucking failure.
When everything goes blissfully black finally, Negan found himself hoping that would be it. He's so fucking tired.
But no, instead he wakes in a panic under an unfamiliar night sky with everything bathed in red. Looking around him, there's blood. His blood? It should be his blood, but he's pretty sure he's goddamn fine fine. Nothing hurts at least. It takes him longer than he cares to admit to find the will to climb to his feet and check properly though.
Part of him wants to stay there and freeze.
The bigger part of him can never do that, no matter how much he wants to stop.
"Goddammit, is this what Hell looks like?" Going pretty hardcore on the spooky vibe, if he does say so himself.
Somewhere in the distance, he hears a familiar voice yelling his name. Raylan--
Fuck, Neal. And how many others were caught in this shit?
That's enough to get him moving again at least.
man about town (OTA)
Well, Negan still isn't sure this shit isn't Hell or some freaky death induced hallucination while his corpse finishes pissing and shitting itself in its death throes. Either way, he can't say he doesn't deserve any of this, if this is some sort of eternal damnation situation. Maybe that's what all of Mathias is. A punishment of some kind for assholes. It doesn't track entirely when he's met plenty of seemingly decent people, but it's a working theory.
After breaking off from Neal and Raylan when he finds them, Negan heads out to search through some shit. 1306, but there's no sign of his other housemates or anything especially useful right in this moment. That's... good? Hopefully anyway. He's taking advantage of the new found clarity in this shitehole and searching whatever he can while he can.
He's also going to keep an eye out for any familiar faces he can. This is all fucked as all goddamn hell, but they're still in this together. They all split up too far without giving a shit about each other, they're just gonna die... again? Whatever.
it's hot in the city tonight (OTA)
Sure, why not a fire storm on top of everything else? Nothing else makes sense, so this might as well goddamn happen to all of them. Negan is near all the action when it starts, the fire almost an entity in its own right. He watches in amazement as it jumps from building to building, leaving some behind unscathed for reasons he can't even fathom or comprehend. It isn't until he realizes it seems like it's coming for people too that he snaps into action.
He can be less of a shit person and try to save someone else, get them out of the way.
Or maybe he'll fail at
even that and get swallowed up by flames before he can even so much as utter "Hey, you! Get the fuck out of the way!"