Underpinning his request, which had stemmed from the unsavoury experience at the museum, is an underlying, flawed but deeply-seated assumption that had gnawed away at Doc for the past 130 years. He had passed that time alone thinking that nobody had come looking for him, even though he knew on some level that he had been put somewhere nigh impossible to be found. It feels, to him, a reasonable request, especially knowing what they know of this sleepy little town. Especially considering they might have known each other for less than three weeks now.
Clearly Raylan doesn't think so and Doc unconsciously straightens up a bit at his name, a name no one really uses. It is always Doc, a profession he had given up so long ago he doesn't even define himself by it anymore. Occasionally Henry, or Hank; his father's name. But John, the man beneath the title, the reputation. Maybe there is still a part of John left somewhere beneath that bravado and the trials that time and several questionable decisions have put him through.
"Things are different for me," he insists. He's wary of weaponising Malcolm's affliction to use against Raylan, which is the only reason he doesn't point out that one of them has to be around for him. If Doc had suffered from similar nightly troubles, he would not want Malcolm and Raylan using it to make a point. From there it is a slippery slope to becoming a burden.
"Come hell or high water I would look for you two, but I sold my soul for that privilege. And if I found either of you in such a state where you might bring harm unto others, if there was nothing I could do to help, I would do what needed to be done, for both my conscience and yours. This is not a sin I would wish upon either of you. Just think me paying back a hundred years of borrowed time and leave me be, Raylan."
no subject
Clearly Raylan doesn't think so and Doc unconsciously straightens up a bit at his name, a name no one really uses. It is always Doc, a profession he had given up so long ago he doesn't even define himself by it anymore. Occasionally Henry, or Hank; his father's name. But John, the man beneath the title, the reputation. Maybe there is still a part of John left somewhere beneath that bravado and the trials that time and several questionable decisions have put him through.
"Things are different for me," he insists. He's wary of weaponising Malcolm's affliction to use against Raylan, which is the only reason he doesn't point out that one of them has to be around for him. If Doc had suffered from similar nightly troubles, he would not want Malcolm and Raylan using it to make a point. From there it is a slippery slope to becoming a burden.
"Come hell or high water I would look for you two, but I sold my soul for that privilege. And if I found either of you in such a state where you might bring harm unto others, if there was nothing I could do to help, I would do what needed to be done, for both my conscience and yours. This is not a sin I would wish upon either of you. Just think me paying back a hundred years of borrowed time and leave me be, Raylan."